Today, I have loved you for 555 days.
I am sorry, it took me a while to figure that out. But yes. I have loved you since Summer of 2013. That was our birthday.
That was after we walked hand in hand by the beach in a moonlit sky. When we sat on a big rock looking at the horizon, hearing only our voices and the serene brutality of the ocean at night.
That was after we laughed at my craziness because I was so scared I won’t let go of your hand. That was after we ate dirty left overs and felt sorry we didn’t eat on time. That was after we slept together in a small tent and we just slept. That’s when I knew I can trust you.
Hun asked me a question yesterday and I didn’t know the answer. So I was going home yesterday and thought about it. This is still not the answer to his question because he was asking me when did we become official. And gosh, who knew?
I’m not sentimental–I’m as romantic as you are. The idea, you know,
is that the sentimental person thinks things will last–the romantic
person has a desperate confidence that they won’t.”
― F. Scott Fitzgerald, This Side of Paradise
I was so busy and pre-occupied lately, I haven’t been able to update my blog.
Here’s the thing.. I lost my job for three long years last week and I was so busy enjoying the days I call Alarm-Free days. I was always out with some friends and now it’s Monday. How time flies. I have to look for another job I will keep until the company will never want me again for the reason I won’t accept for the life of me.
I am just glad that my friends won’t leave me and they are very supportive. I actually forgot about my love life for the time being but hey, we are still ok. I can’t wait until it’s Thursday again and we’ll be together again until Sunday.
I am at Starbucks waiting for my Two Friends. We’ll have discipleship meeting first and then they’ll drop me off to the new office I hope I will belong. Pray for me peeps.
A good read I thought I would share with you.
Click here to read..
Mad Monday it is!
Go as far as your mind can go.
Now, I feel like I’m next to you.
If it is as easy as that, I no longer need to be sad when I miss you.
Here I am, wide awake. Awakened by the idea of losing you in the process. At times like this, I only wish to say things I wasn’t able to say when I had a chance. Had I known there wouldn’t be any chance to tell you, I would’ve said it. I would’ve told you but my heart was shattered long before I could speak. My heart’s lost to you. I could not believe I am still drawn to you like you never had me broken. This is the downside of things…
…when you love and you’re blinded with the idea of love.
Nothing hurts like watching our relationship fall apart. There was no apparent reason how it all began. It’s like clouds in the sky. I see it moving, but I cannot have a taste of it. I will quit pretending right now. I am not ok.
I am writing this again in the midst of my sadness. I am thinking of you again. And you see, I just started this series in my blog and I can’t stop writing. I guess, we can relate this to the fact that I can’t stop thinking about you. That’s mainly the reason. I write about you because I love you. I write about you because I hate you. Right now, I am in love and in hate with you. But you are my totality. This blog is for you.
I am not certain how I am going to start this, but I’ll start anyway. I woke up disappointed and unhappy, and I have always been. That’s what I feel whenever I wake up without your messages on my inbox. I always sleep with the hope of waking up to your sweet messages. More than 24 hours, and I didn’t hear from you. I would’ve gone to the police station to report you are missing from me. But I figured out, you are not mine, there’s no reason I will lose you.
It’s normal for people to ask this question when you decide to press release your relationship. The significance of the meeting for couples are very rare. Some circumstances are based on the social activities. Or the location. Or maybe you know him forever you didn’t think it’s still important to remember.
So if I am to answer this question. I met my partner in the mountain. One morning, around 4 of the year 2012, friends were socializing and I just woke up. This man just came out of nowhere and he’s drunk. Not impressive to begin with. But that was their event and I was just invited. So he is friends with everyone in my crowd except for me. Then we were introduced to each other. It wasn’t a formal introduction since I already mentioned, he was drunk and I was sober.
So then he slept. I was just sitting outside his tent and he snored like a big man. But he isn’t a big man. And so on. After hours, breakcamp, then we all started to descent. At Evercrest, we took bath and I was combing my hair when he called me and said “Nice Shirt!”
So there, it started with “Nice Shirt!”
He added me on his Facebook Account, he kept in touch, year after year, we still get to see each other. And all the time, it’s special. Until the 26th of August of this year 2014, we finally decided to start a relationship.
What’s your story?